A bit of distance: why better decisions start with stepping back

On a recent flight out of the country for the weekend, it occurred to me how different everything looks from above.

Not in a poetic sense. Just a noticeable shift.

You look down and realise how quickly detail disappears with distance. Roads become lines. Buildings flatten out. The sense of urgency you carry around day-to-day doesn’t translate at that height.

That shift is useful.

There’s an idea the Stoics used that mirrors this. Marcus Aurelius practised it as a way to think more clearly. He would deliberately step back from whatever was in front of him and look at it against a wider backdrop—time, other people, the constant movement of life.

In *Meditations*, he describes viewing life as a continuous flow—people working, arguing, celebrating, dealing with things, and then moving on. Nothing stays central for long.

It’s a useful contrast to how most of us operate.

Because we tend to stay zoomed in.

Why distance changes how we think

There’s a concept in psychology called cognitive fusion. It’s when your thoughts feel so convincing that you stop questioning them. They become reality rather than interpretation, which is why small situations can escalate quickly in your head.

There’s good evidence behind how common that is:

Studies suggest up to 47% of our waking time is spent thinking about something other than what we’re doing.

People who mind-wander more frequently report lower levels of happiness, regardless of the activity.

Rumination has been shown to increase both the intensity and duration of stress responses, even when the trigger is minor.

In investing, reacting to short-term noise consistently leads to worse long-term outcomes than staying disciplined.

In simple terms: the closer you are to your thoughts, the more convincing—and often exaggerated—they become.

How small moments grow in our heads

You can see it in everyday moments.

A comment that lands slightly wrong. Someone being short with you. A message that doesn’t get a reply. The event itself is brief. What grows is everything around it—replaying it, interpreting it, adding meaning that may or may not be there.

By the end, you’re dealing with something much bigger than what actually happened.

That expansion is mostly internal.

The value of stepping back

The “view from above” cuts through that.

It doesn’t remove the situation. It just brings it back to its actual size.

One way to apply it is to change the timeframe. Take whatever’s bothering you and move it forward—five or ten years. You’re explaining it without the emotion attached. What actually holds up?

Usually, very little.

Not because it didn’t matter, but because it wasn’t as central as it felt at the time.

Perspective changes how we interpret others

It also changes how you read other people.

If someone snaps at you, the instinct is to take it personally. From a bit of distance, it’s one moment in a day you don’t fully see. Stress, pressure, distraction—something else is likely influencing it.

You don’t need to excuse it, but you also don’t need to carry it further.

Because however far you take it in your head, that version only exists there.

Using distance without disengaging

The aim isn’t to detach from everything or pretend things don’t matter. It’s to avoid treating every frustration as something that deserves your full attention.

Back on the plane, nothing on the ground has changed. The same conversations are happening. The same problems exist.

You’ve just changed your position relative to them.

And that shift is often enough.

A simple check for clarity

So the next time something small starts taking up more space than it should, pause and step back—just briefly.

Think of it as a small shift in perspective.

A useful check is to ask: how would three people you respect see this?

Not people who think like you. People whose judgement you trust. People who tend to stay measured.

What would they focus on? What would they ignore? How would they respond?

That alone is often enough to change how you see it.

Then keep it simple:

What actually happened?

What have I added to it?

How much of this will matter in a week?

Not overthinking it. Just checking.

Because a bit of distance usually brings clarity.

And clarity tends to lead to better decisions.

A final thought

Our role is to help clients step back and see the wider picture. What actually matters over time. What’s worth acting on, and what isn’t.

That perspective leads to calmer, more consistent decision-making.

Nothing complicated.

Just a slightly wider view, applied where it counts.

A conversation with the team at James Todd & Co can help you see how this applies to you and your own business.